Saturday, February 02, 2008

Grampa Jim

On December 14th, 2007, I became a grandfather with the birth of my grandson, Jackson James Aldeguer Weaver. His dad is my son Nathan and his mom is Ms. Cherry Ann Aldeguer. I always wondered what it would feel like when this time came and a new child was brought into our family. He was born in California (where he'll be living with his mother) which isn't quite drivable (with any ease) from Villa Rica, Georgia, my "new" (as of August) home. Nathan's in Peoria with his Caterpillar training program and scheduled to travel to his third and final assignment in July, 2008. I had pictured the "usual" (for my generation) scenerio with a married child and their mate having a baby and rearing it in the "usual" family unit way. I'm very happy that all went well with the birth and I was extremely honored and choked up with their choice of my name as Jackson's middle name. I know that Nathan and Cherry Ann will arrive at their own style of raising and parenting young Jack, and that they'll do a fine job of it. I told Nathan that I'm proud and very glad to be whatever type of grampa he would like me to be, but that I will follow his lead due to his unique situation. I get to meet mom and grandson on Feb.23rd and I'm excited as is my special one, Linda. It's going to be take-it-as-it-comes and we'll love him and treasure him as we watch him grow. Cherry Ann has been great in sending emails with links to pictures of young Jackson, his growth and change recorded for all to see, and Nathan keeps things and pics up-to-date on his blog. It's life and love of a child in a different light than I'd planned for, but it's also a wonderful feeling that I wouldn't change for the world. I'm a grampa and damn proud of it!

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Thursday, April 12, 2007

Georgia On My Mind

Jim Weaver For my "0" readers I'd just like to say that I'm now learning to survive in the Metro Atlanta area with my new sweetie Linda. We've been progressing towards each other since late October and I now pretty much reside here in Villa Rica, Georgia, 30180. I commute at least twice a month back to the great town of Perrysburg for family visits, doctor's appointments and whatever else requires my attention in the eternal scheme of life. Sometimes Linda comes with me and so far I've been fortunate enough that Cheryl, the 1999 Honda Odyssey minivan I inherited with the conclusion of my divorce, has held up and just turned 197,000 miles and is still purring along. New brakes and tires are all she has asked for other than the regular-type oil change. I hope she goes on for a long time and helps keep her replacement, my 2007 blue Camry, out of the weather and free from the 10 to 11 hour drive and associated mileage. My golf game is erratic but I've already posted 27 rounds since January to a handicap of 10.5 so I keep on plugging away. Linda's been great, she loves golf and me and has seemingly passed the "new-person-in-our-father's-life" test, administered with a great attitude by my wondeful kids. The weather hasn't always been peaches-and-cream but it beats the snow, freezing rain and negative wind chills of Northwest Ohio during the November to May period. I'm very happy and moving past the tough last couple of years. So if you're of a mind to share in some Southern hospitality, look me up.

Monday, January 01, 2007

2007 A New Life

Well, it's January 1, 2007 (2:38 am) and I'm still kicking and ready to tackle another year head-on to see if I can stay upright and greet 2008. 2008, doesn't that sound so far away from the worldwide celebration of the great Y2K (2ooo for those of you who may have passed out and missed it)? I survived 2006 and it was a rough ride, but I face this new year with a renewed appreciation for the life I lead. I have the 4 greatest kids in the world, I have someone who loves me and I'm remembering how to be happy. I'm moving on and my smile and sense of joy,wonder and bemusement at the absurdities of this world and the people in it have returned. May 2007 be a new life for each and every one of us, each day is an adventure to be savored and enjoyed, and if something tries to spoil that day-deal with it as best you can. Nothing's guaranteed, so live each day as if you may not see the morning sun and you'll find yourself enriched for the experience. Life sucks at times, but I've learned (especially over the last several years) that if you're waiting for someone else to lead you out of the muck and mire, you'd best be prepared to wait a long while. You have to take responsibility for your own happiness and since I have, I've found that good things and good people are all around. And if you're real lucky, you just might fall in love.

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Finally Divorced

Since I have no readers, I'm not sure I should bother, but as a matter of history, my divorce became final August 21, 2006. I thought in the beginning of the procedings (Nov.2004) that when it was done I'd have my children to work with to start "our" new family unit and that I wouldn't have to deal too much with my ex-wife. Now I realize that even though we're no longer a couple, I'll be involved with her until one of us dies. Once we get through the necessary paperwork that goes with dissolving a marriage, we will always have the common thread of our children and the need to interact in a triangulated sort of arrangement whenever the need arises. Since my children are the best part of my life, I will do everything possible to help them, with or without any assistance or input from their mother. Starting a new "family" while living in an 800 square foot apartment isn't the easiest thing to do but I will do my best to establish communication with, provide advice and assistance for, and , most of all, let Erin, Ashleigh, Nathan and Alissa know that I love them unconditionally and profoundly. I'm proud to be their father and I'm proud of each of them for the people they are and the paths they are taking. I'm sure there are stumbling blocks in many places as I forge ahead into the unknown life of a divorced parent, but I am happy and will keep them and my own needs in the forefront. Knowing that our love goes both ways always gives me hope and strength and a joy that grows each day. I love them and that's what matters most.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

The End Is Near

As some of you fans know (note the truly astounding number of comments I generate per posting) I have been involved in a drawn-out divorce which has truly changed my outlook on life, relationships, and the pursuit of happiness. As of this date, the paperwork has begun to work it's way throught the attorneys, then to the Magistrate, then to the Judge and finally to the Recorder who enters it into the "Big Book of Divorced People" (available in hard-cover or paperback at quality book stores in Wood County, Ohio). If you order a copy you need at least a quarter-ton pickup or major SUV to take it to your place of residence, it makes a great, extra-firm mattress or backless couch. It has been a long and very draining process, lasting almost 2 years. I don't know how long the paperwork jouney will take but if it's done by Christmas it'll be egg-nog for all! Throughout , I have had the support of friends, co-workers, family and Cheryl, my 1999 Honda Odyssey with over 176,000 miles on her. I know it has been tough on my kids and if I could have done anything to lessen the hurt, I would have done it in a heartbeat. My relationship with them has forever changed and we are all in the infant stages of whatever relationships arise from the ashes of a marriage. I love them dearly and take some comfort that, as their dad, we will be able to take those baby-steps into our collective futures. Does time heal the "wounds"? Only time will tell. It's a new reality and a new beginning for me and I'm taking it one day at a time because I only have today and I can't find anyone or anything that will guarantee me that I'll see tomorrow. This treatise has a very somber tone and I guess that's only fitting. There is a relief that the finality of the diovorce is nearer but it hasn't been fun and unlike some other divorces I've heard about there won't be any big celebration when it's done. I'll take my time and enjoy the day but it's a little hard to celebrate when the ones you love most are trying to adjust to you and your new-found singleness. My happiness is my family and especially my kids. The day-to-day routes to other sources of happiness are being constantly explored and life isn't the downer that I've made it sound like. I look forward with hope and forge ahead with humor. One day at a time.

Thursday, March 23, 2006

Why Worry?

As my birthday approaches, March 31st, I feel as if the NCAA had me in mind when it came up with "March Madness". They used the moniker to describe the emotional energy expended and the roller-coaster ride of emotions over which college basketball fans endure/enjoy/despair. I've come through many a season and now find myself thinking not of b-ball but of my current state of existence, a caught-in-the-middle limbo between the feeling of an enjoyable future out there somewhere and the constantly frustrating hell of wondering when will I be able to get on with my life. Each day brings a new obstacle in one form or another, the legal system just wasn't made for the dissolving of a marriage. Nothing could ever prepare anyone for divorce, but I wouldn't wish the pain?, anger?, sorrow?, tearing out one set of feelings and finding others to replace them? on anyone who really gave a damn about his family. Madness? ABSOLUTELY! March? Another month with no end in site. A Birthday? "Another day older and deeper in debt" plus the added year bringing you one more reason to enjoy however many you may have left. Today I can walk, talk,eat and perform an infinite number of other useless, truly enjoyable or meaningful tasks. But if a truck changes that tomorrow, the madness only changes shape, and if I'm not here to answer the questions it poses then others may find the answers and CBS will have its catch-phrase all to itself. The others will have to fit the answers to their own questions. I just hope they don't have March birthdays or if they do, they find the answers to the madness give them the power to make their lives a joyous celebration as if they have won the biggest prize they have sought.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Been a Long Time

To anyone who may read this I say "thank you" for my readership is basically 0 and that's ok, especially since it's taken me so long to update my space. It's December in Northwest Ohio and that means snow and cold and we have both as the shoppers rush home with their treasures. Two favorite antidotes for some of the locals are: (1) Yukon Jack, "The Black Sheep of Canadian Liquors" whose label plainly states "Yukon Jack is a taste born of hoary nights, when lonely men struggled to keep their fires lit and cabins warm. Boldly flavorful, yet surprising smooth,there is no spirit like Yukon Jack". (More on this to follow) (2) A trip to sunny Florida for golf and relaxation. (this also will be expounded upon).

Yukon Jack when taken internally in liberal amounts can definitely light a fire in your midsection and thus allow a fellow to keep his cabin warm ,even if his cabin is only in his mind. As for the "hoary nights", I figure this must be the Canadian way of misspelling a certain word and really refers to the great Canadian tradition of conjuring up imaginary "shapely-adorables" to share a "mind cabin" ( "shapely adorables" being a phrase often used by one of my favorite authors, Dan Jenkins, who I must credit here or risk possible libel charges on my next application to coach a college football team or become a CEO of some major world corporation). The gender and genus of these "adorables" is left to the mind of the imbiber and I've been told these Canadians can take a very wide and extremely liberal interpretation of this phrase, a thought that you, dear reader, may ponder on your own time.

Florida, ahhh, that hurricane-ridden, warm-weather haven for many of us who are becoming more and more despondent at the thoughts of cold, snow and freezing rain/ice. (although I'm told there are some true sickos who actually like this stuff for purposes such as skiing, sledding, skating and Yukon Jack and his so-called "hoars"). Florida supports (and also robs) the U.S. and it's own economy by having hurricanes rip through it every year thereby insuring that millions and even billions of our dollars get super-sucked into the gaping pocket and wallets of scam-artists, corrupt politicians and local officials, contractors, salesmen, zoning commissioners, permit-givers and falsifiers, roofers, building material suppliers and manufacturers, alligator and snake getter-ridder-ofers, and a cast of thousands. However, each year the hurricanes manage to spare some part of the "Sunshine State" and leave us northerners a place to fly to and indulge in our usual summer-like activities. So away I went for a week of shorts, golf, drink and good felowship with the aforementioned and now-infamous Sprout. For four days I played the best golf of this season ( and of recent seasons ) with 75,76,81,and 73, the 75 included a 2 under par on one nine and the 73 included a 1 under par on another nine. The weather was gorgeous and the company grand, the dread upon take-off from Orlando heading back to Detroit was pervasive and thick, a sensory wall of fun-deprivation and thoughts of the pain-in-the-backside (this blog is somewhat suitable for those aver age 5) return to old winter survival routines. I'm now 9 days back and already hoping to return to the sunny south asap. So what if the dollar-suckers roam freely there, at least they're wearing summertime garb,though some of the dreaded "blue-hairs"-and you know who they/you are!!-make garish attire seem commonplace and driving the highways and byways an honest and justifiable reason for various forms of "road rage". But, they've got their smirks firmly in place-'cause it's warm and golf/drinking/partying is the routine, not a dream for us in the realm of salt trucks and multi-car pileups.

On a final note, thanks go out to my son, Nathan, whose Open Skate with Nate blog has a splendid treatise on the Miller Family Reunion and also lists my comment. It is a must-read piece for all.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Random Thoughts

My golf game finally came together with a 77 and a 75 along with winning multiple prizes at the Jew For A Day tournament. Longest drive; On a par 5 in two and closest to the pin; and first place as a scrambles team. Why? I have no clue! It has to have something to do with being a Cosmic Antenna for wierd thoughts, a channeler of unrelated, unloved, stupidly funny, twistingly ironic, hilarious, glad-sad-mad-bad ideas running amok throughout the space-time continuum. Thoughts that strike unannounced at any moment without any rhyme, reason, purpose, known source or importance-yet they cause me giggles, guffaws and sometimes belly-aching laughter and tears of mirth (which I often share with anyone close to me who wishes to know "what's so funny?"). Went fishing at a pond this evening and caught three bass but mostly enjoyed cursing out loud with no one to hear me and cause me remorse. Bowled a 211 game and a 518 series my first week out, must have been the Scotch. Saw a guy literally smash his bowling ball into pieces because he missed several attempts at the 10 pin, the powers that be may toss his ass out of our league which is supposed to be for fun not fame-I've broken golf clubs before but a bowling ball? C'mon man lighten up it's not only a game but you sucked that night. Trading emails with my son in Spain, but having trouble getting calls through the Spanish phone system which I believe is powered by futbol-crazed rodents when they're not on siesta. Miss his voice and the ability to convey thoughts, feelings and emotions along with sharing recent experiences-all in a matter of minutes rather than reading of his life and trading typewritten words. I once read a sign in a basement pool-hall that said "Illegitimi Non Carborundum" which I was told means Don't Let The Bastards Get You Down. If so , it fits life in it's known forms and is the gift I leave you with tonight. Say goodnight Gracie.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Jim Weaver

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

And A Child Shall Teach Them

Today I write a more serious story. As a volunteer at The American Red Cross I can speak from experience of the tremendous outpouring of support and donations of many kinds for the victims of Hurricane Katrina. This huge storm has devastated the states of Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama and has impacted all regions of this country in ways to numerous to list. Today, as I was moving comfort supplies for loading, I held the elevator door for a mom and dad and their young daughter, probably 7 to 9 years old. She held in her hand a coffee can with a home-made label around it. Her parents were praising her and telling her how proud they were of her when I asked her if she had just made a donation. She smiled a huge,rediant smile and the gap between her front teeth and her freckles added to the tremendous pride and joy in her sparkling blue eyes. She said "yes" and then her mom said "tell him how you did it. She smiled at me and said " I had a lemonade stand and I just donated $276". I complimented her and thanked her for her help and her smile and pride filled the elevator. As they exited I could still hear her parents telling her how proud they were, and I had a moment of real personal reflection on my 4 kids. I'm as proud a father as you can find and I love my children deeply. I know their character and spirit. They are entering the world and hoping to make their mark on it, one of which they can be proud. It's a good feeling to know that there are still children following mine that teach us all about helping, caring, selflessly giving and not expecting something in return. I will remember that girl and her smile for a long time.

5:49 PM

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Tuesday, August 30, 2005

"Everything is pretty much what it is"-Dan Jenkins

As we in Northwest Ohio await with baited breath (usually done with live squid or parts thereof) for the arrival of the rainy end of Hurricane Katrina, the plot thickens. While pursuing the agony of defeat in the form of the inner battle between golf implements and scorecards, I have managed to continue my mastery over the Sprout. On this very day, 8/30/05, after scorching the front nine at White Pines (of which there are many genuine trees present unlike Shady Oaks and some other places of little or no interest) in 38 and with the visions of finally breaking 80 for the first time this year, the wheels fell off with back-to-back doubles, 1 OB, 2 doing the backstroke and staggering in with 43 to hold off the charging Sprout by 1, I found no solace in the dead squirrel in the parking lot. As it was too early to get trashed and with the Red Cross beckoning, I did find a bit of comfort in the title of that immortal song, "My Give A Damn's Busted". The Sprout has yet to conquer my unyielding spirit (as has Spanish Nate of late) and I for one think it has to do with the burning question I pose to Nate and/or any other Spanish -knowing folk, "DOES the rain in Spain fall mainly on the plain?" or is that some secret Spanish -related code for treacle preparation? More to follow when the puzzle pieces escape the box.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Life Its Ownself

Life sometimes stinks but cologne covers a multitude of smelly stuff